funny lawyers

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I just read these in the paper this morning!  Hope ya'll enjoy it as much as
I did!

Sis. Brenda

These are questions (taken from official u.s. court records) lawyers have put
to people on the stand:

Q: Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

Q: Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most
cases he just passes quietly away and doesn''t know anything about it until
the next morning?

Q:  What happened then?
A:  He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."
Q:  Did he kill you?

Q:  Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?

Q:  The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

Q:  Were you alone or by yourself?

Q:  How long have you been a French Canadian?

Q:  Do you have any children or anything of that kind?

Q:  I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.
A:  That's me
Q:  Were you present when that picture was taken?

Q:  Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?

Q:  Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A:  By death.
Q:  And by whose death was it terminated?

Q:  Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
A:  I'll be three months on Nov 8th.
Q:  Apparently, then the date of conception was Aug 8th?
A:  Yes.
Q:  What were you doing at that time?

Q:  Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotional stable?
A:  I used to be
Q:  How many times have you committed suicide?

Q:  So you were gone until you returned?

Q:  She had three children, right?
A:  Yes
Q:  How many were boys:
A:  None
Q:  Were there any girls?

Q:  You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but
can you describe it?

Q:  You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
A:  Yes.
Q:  And these stairs, did they go up also?

Q:  Have you lived in this town all your life?
A:  Not yet.

Q:  Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr.
Edington at the Rose Chapel?
A:  It was in the evening.  The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m.
Q:  And Mr. Edington was dead at the time, is that correct?

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