WV Trooper ... nyuk, nyuk's

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A West Virginia state trooper was the first to arrive at the scene of a
two car accident.  As he pulled over, he saw two cars in ditches on
either side of an interstate highway, and a decapitated head in the
middle of the road.  Climbing out of his car, he stepped over to the
first car and pulled out a notepad . . . car in d-e-t-c-h . . . "nope,
that's not it" . . . car in d-e-c-t-h . . . "nope, that's not it either"
. . . car in d-e-i-t-c . . . "durn, that ain't it either" . . . car in
d-i-t-c-h . . . "yeah, thats it!"

The trooper then stepped across the road to the other car, and wrote
down the same info as the first.  Then he walked over to the decapitated
head lying in the middle of the interstate.  Head in e-n-t-i-r-s-t-i-t .
. . "nope, that ain't it" . . . Head in i-n-d . . . The cop then looks
around and quickly kicks the head into the ditch . . . Head in d-i-t-c-h
. . . "Yeah, that sounds good!"

=========================================================================

A fellow goes to a gypsy-fortune teller who says, "For twnety dollars,
I'll read your future and you can ask three questions."

"About what?"

"About anything", she says.

"Isn't twenty dollars a lot of money?"

"Not too much. Now what is your last question?"

=========================================================================

TOP TEN REASONS FOR SITTING AT THE FRONT OF THE CHURCH

10. Statistics show that the front of the church building is the safest
in the event of a natural disaster.

9. You can see if anything's caught between the Preacher's teeth. Then
watch him as you smile and point.

8. There's still lots of padding in these kneelers since they are almost
like new.

7. You only have to comb the back of your hair and iron the back of your
shirt.

6. It's easier to trip the ushers.

5. No one will hear your stomach make those 'alien' noises.

4. You're the Treasurer and want to keep your eye on the collection.

3. You want to justify that feeling you've always had that every ones
looking at you.

2. You're mad at everyone in the church and want to make sure no one
sits beside you.

And the #1 reason for sitting at the front of the church is . . .
1. You actually love worshiping God and feeding on His Word!
--
Bro Tyler Nally <tnally@iquest.net> <tgnally@prairienet.org>

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