Fw: More Darwin awards

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For your enjoyment..... 

>> Subject: FW: More Darwin awards
>> 
>> Don't try these at home
>> 
>> DARWIN AWARD CANDIDATES
>> 
>> 1.  In September in Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned
>> in
>> two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide
>> sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.
>> 
>> 2.  In October, a 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally
>> zoned when he ran," according to his wife, accidentally jogged off a
>> 200-foot-high cliff on his daily run.
>> 
>> 3.  Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when an 8-foot-deep hole he had
>> dug into the sand caved in as he sat inside it. Beachgoers said Daniel
>> Jones, 21, dug the hole for fun, or protection  from the wind, and had
>> been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom  Thursday afternoon when
>> it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand.  People on the
>> beach,
>> on the outer banks, used their hands and shovels, trying to claw their
>> way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not reach him.
>> It
>> took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him
>> while about 200 people looked on. Jones was pronounced dead at a
>> hospital.
>> 
>> 4.  In February, Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed in Lompoc, CA, as
>> he
>> fell face-first through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was
>> burglarizing. Death was caused when the long  flashlight he had placed
>> in his mouth (to keep his hands free) crammed  against the base of his
>> skull as he hit the floor.
>> 
>> 5.  According to  police in Dahlonega, GA, ROTC cadet Nick Berrena,
>> 20, was stabbed to death in January by fellow cadet Jeffrey Hoffman,
>> 23, who was trying to  prove that a knife could not penetrate the
>> flakvest Berrena was wearing.
>> 
>> 6.  Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed in February in Selbyville,
>> Del., as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a
>> revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.
>> 
>> 7.  In February, according to police in Windsor, Ont., Daniel Kolta,
>> 27, and Randy Taylor, 33, died in a head-on collision, thus earning a
>> tie in the game of chicken they were playing with their snowmobiles.
>> 
>> 8.  In September, a 7-year-old boy fell off a 100-foot-high bluff near
>> Ozark, Arkansas, after he lost his grip swinging on a cross that
>> marked
>> the spot where another person had fallen to his death in 1990.
>> 
>> DARWIN AWARD HONORABLE MENTIONS
>> 
>> (1) In Guthrie, Okla., in October, Jason Heck tried to kill a
>> millipede
>> with a shot from his .22-caliber rifle, but the bullet ricocheted off
>> a
>> rock near the hole and hit pal Antonio Martinez in the head,
>> fracturing
>> his skull.
>> 
>> (2) In Elyria, Ohio, in October, Martyn Eskins, attempting to clean
>> out cobwebs in his basement, declined to use a broom in favor of a
>> propane torch and caused a fire that burned the first and second
>> floors of his house.
>> 
>> (3) Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in Andover Township, NJ, in
>> September, and his wife Bonnie was also injured, by a quarter-stick of
>> dynamite that blew up in their car. While driving around at 2 AM, the
>> bored couple lit the dynamite and tried to toss it out the window to
>> see what would  happen, but they apparently failed to notice that the
>> window was closed.
>> 
>> (4) Taking "Amateur Night" Too Far: In Betulia, Colombia, an annual
>> festival in November includes five days of amateur bullfighting. This
>> year, no bull was killed, but dozens of matadors were injured,
>> including
>> one gored in the head and one Bobbittized. Said one participant, "It's
>> just one bull against a town of a thousand morons."
>> 

In His Service...
Kirk Moore
United Pentecostal Church of Renton.
Renton, WA

"Black holes are created when God divides by zero"