Cows ... nyuk, nyuk

• Messages sorted by:[ date ][ thread ][ subject ][ author ]

Two cows were grazing alongside a highway when a milk truck went by.  On
the side of the truck were the words:
"PASTEURIZED, HOMOGENIZED, STANDARDIZED, VITAMIN A ADDED."

One cow turned to the other and said, "Makes a girl feel sort of
inadequate, doesn't it?"

                      ~~~  Bad Advice!  ~~~

A city man was tooling down a country road when his car sputtered to a
complete stop near a field filled with cows.  The driver, getting out to
see what was the matter, noticed one of the cows looking at him.  "I
believe it's your radiator," said the cow.
The man nearly jumped right out of his city slicker britches!  He ran to
the nearest farmhouse and knocked on the door.  "A cow just gave me
advice about my car!" he shouted, waving his arms frantically back
toward the field.
The farmer nonchalantly leaned out beyond the door frame to glance down
the field.  "The cow with two big black spots on it?" the farmer asked
slowly.
"Yes!  Yes!  That's the one!" the excited man replied.
"Oh.  Well, that's Ethel," the farmer said, turning back to the man.
"Don't pay any attention to her.  She doesn't know a thing about cars."

-------------------------------------------

"A programmer is a person who passes as an exacting expert on the basis
of being able to turn out, after innumerable punching, an infinite
series of incomprehensive answers calculated with micrometric
precisions from vague assumptions based on debatable figures taken from
inconclusive documents and carried out on instruments of problematical
accuracy by persons of dubious reliability and questionable mentality
for the avowed purpose of annoying and confounding a hopelessly
defenseless department that was unfortunate enough to ask for the
information in the first place."
                -- IEEE Grid newsmagazine
--
 ______ ___   __ _____ __    __   __  __ tnally@iquest.net tnally@mcp.com
|_    _|   \ |  |  _  |  |  |  |  \ \/ / tgnally@prairienet.org
  |  | |  |\\|  |  _  |  |__|  |__ |  |  T. Nally - "A M.I.M.E. is a
  |__| |__| \___|_| |_|_____|_____||__|  a terrible thing to waste."